Itsy bitsy teeny weeny...

Yellow polk-a-dot bikini. That is the goal of working out. Right? To look good in a bikini. Well, I'm not sure I even want to wear a bikini, so revealing. Oh yes I do, I can find one that looks appropriately on a 35 year old mother, somewhere. The point is...I'm working out. But, I have one hang up. I want to see my results IMMEDIATELY! Why can't I workout for 30 minutes and see a chiseled muscle instantly? I feel like everyone else in the world, or at least around me, is getting and can get faster results than I do.

But, I have to ask myself why I am really working out. Am I doing it for that bikini? Sure that would be nice but, summer only lasts a short time. Am I doing it to have chiseled muscles? Well, that would be nice too but I won't be signing up for a body building competition. Do I want others around me to see a skinny me? Yes, oh yes. But, they don't live in my shoes everyday. So I want all of these things but, they are not my primary goal of working out. I want to be healthy. I want to have energy. I want to look and feel younger and be able to act that way too. I want to keep up with my kids forever. I want my kids to have a healthy example of keeping our bodies fit. And, I want to be used by God and that includes / involves my body. (I Corinthians 6:19-20; 9:24-27).

I must remember these things as I struggle daily with my thoughts about my body and working out. I want to be in shape for many reasons. But, I want to have a healthy perspective of being healthy and in shape. So that when I am sick for a week in bed I am not beating myself up for not working out. Or that I do not become angered with myself the following week when I can't make it through a 50 minute workout.

I do know one thing though I have to also train my mind. It is very easy to be critical of some woman hosting the workout video I am using - that makes me better in her eyes, right? What? She can't even see me and will never know me. Who cares about her - just do the exercises. But, I need to be positive to myself and proud of myself when I make even small accomplishments of working out even 1 day after the next. This is the most I've ever worked out before in my life - consistently. I can do this. I CAN be strong and in shape and healthy. I WANT this life.